ink_in_hand: For all art and craft sales (Brain Broke)
[personal profile] ink_in_hand
Just extremely wiped out with everything that's been happening, to the point that even my insomnia hasn't reared it's ugly head for months. As much as you guys are awesome, socializing is work for me and every time I think the stress will leave me alone to recharge my batteries something else comes up. Frustratingly enough, art has been eluding me too.

Such as earlier this month I had to go to court for a Show Cause in my missing jury duty, thanks to a whole slew of bad circumstances that Murphy would be proud of. The initial notice was sent to my old address at the house on the lake my family lost (no matter that I registered a new address) so it had to be redirected, and then I was at [livejournal.com profile] heslestor 's place for several weeks and so didn't get my mail until I got back, no matter that my parent's were collecting my mail and they didn't tell me that I had an important fragging government letter. Had to pay $50 out of pocket for it all too, yay. At least I don't have anything on record. Stress, how I loathe thee.

Practically living with [livejournal.com profile] heslestor now, even got it official too. I know I haven't kept things updated on that account, but it's turning out very nicely. Never thought I'd find myself enjoying the company of someone else enough to even think of hanging out more than a few times a month and here I've got someone I moved in with. It's pretty much the only good thing I've had going for me this past year when my folks began to and then lost the place I grew up on for good. And the only problems that've come up in my moving is figuring out where the hell I'm going to put my library. (seriously, I've got more than 700 books at last count) It boggles me mind that we haven't even gotten into an argument yet.

Been trying to support my folks with the divorce, but they're not making it easy. Mom's religion comes first in her life even before family,  which I wouldn't have such a problem with if her faith wasn't so blind. Even just talking about it in less than brilliantly gleaming light can make her mad at you for several days. And my dad can be just as blind to topics outside of what he accepts, as well as needing a clueXbyXfour upside the head more often than not. Though the fact that he is a crossdresser* and the fact that wearing woman's clothes is a part of his identity implies more devious activities such as being unfaithful in my mom's religion doesn't help matters. Then I got both of them pulling at me trying to support one side or the other more, and they don't even notice it no matter how many times I've pointed it out.

*And just to make a certain point crystal clear, there is nothing wrong with being a crossdresser. That's not why he aggravates me, even if it bothers my mom.

Some of the other stress is money matters, still owe my dentist quite a bit for her work with my root canal. Plus a bit more now that one of my folks scheduled an appointment without my knowledge and I had to get fillings. Keep getting promised money back from what I lent my parents (to try to keep the property I so loved) when their business investments finally pull through, but I have no faith in such matters. It's been "just a little longer" for far too long.

Then the rest of the stress is my family making plans and then changing them what feels like a dozen times over. This is important as I don't have a vehicle under my own name yet. Plans can change, I understand this as life doesn't always follow what you expect to happen, but there is a limit as to what can be blame on forces outside one's control.

Comments aren't expected/required as I don't know if I can handle them right now. But I just wanted you guys to know that I'm still alive and I miss you guys and I want to come back and that I'm planning on it, but life keeps kicking me in the rear and making it really hard to socialize beyond the bare minimum required. Haven't even been able to lurk much either, I know I've missed a lot of what's going on in this little corner of the internets.

(and I know I've got some reply-commenting to catch up on, so don't be too surprised to see some older topics revisited)

on 2011-03-27 04:19 am (UTC)
eerian_sadow: (Default)
Posted by [personal profile] eerian_sadow
*hugs* i missed you!

i'm glad things are... well, i can't say "working out" precisely since there's still Shit Happening (as it does), but i'm glad that life isn't kicking you down and dragging you through fields of manure.

on 2011-03-27 05:05 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] rosetintdshades.livejournal.com
Be well, my friend. I don't forsee the internet disappearing anytime soon, so I will be around and looking forward to your return.

on 2011-03-27 12:37 pm (UTC)
Posted by [personal profile] lady_katana4544
*Hugs* Definitely missed you here, hon! Hopefully things get worked for you quickly.

on 2011-03-27 05:33 pm (UTC)

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